Another year. Another National Day coming up.
But this year, the feeling is just not there.
In this place where the one sure thing is change, I am feeling displaced for the first time.
Mind you, belonging to the minority of minorities in Singapore, I would well have felt out of place years ago.
I didn’t.
But something has changed fundamentally in Singapore over the past few years.
What is it exactly?
I can’t put my finger on it.
Still, it’s there. Like the heat you feel from a rash that’s about to break out.
I tell people that I chose not to stay in Australia after university because Singapore is home.
Truth is, Australia has more than enough Arts graduates and wouldn’t accept me unless I have half a million invested in the land Down Under.
If I were an accountant, baker or hairstylist (I am not kidding), they’d beg me to stay. But I’d still say:
“Singapore is home.”
I am beginning to question that.
Is this strange, unrecognisable, crowded place home?
The place where I grew up?
The people that I grew up with?
Democracy, justice, equality, happiness, prosperity, progress.
Onward Singapore, let’s move on.
py
/ Friday, 8 August 2008I don’t feel the National Day mood this year either…..
acroamatic
/ Friday, 8 August 2008Yup, almost 9 August and still the same. The last couple of years, my colleagues would informally try to wear red on 8 Aug. This year, no effort. Also, there didn’t seem to be a National Day Observance either! Perhaps that was due to the Rag & Flag Day.
Ee
/ Saturday, 9 August 2008Funnily enough, i have been feeling the National Day mood for a while now. Relishing every minute of it actually…. my last National Day at home for probably a long long time to come.
RockyRacoon
/ Saturday, 9 August 2008Poor economy, hype over the Beijing Olympics… bad vibes in the air…
Victor Koo
/ Sunday, 10 August 2008I did wear red… but only to qualify for a 43% discount at a hotel buffet lunch. :p
Teutoburg
/ Monday, 11 August 2008That is the feeling of uncertainty.
But don’t be surprised. Neighbors to the north have had more than a decade full of this. That has since changed again and it isn’t optimism.
Nation states and civilizations rise and fall. However short these may last, they usually sputter on for than a generation. Your life however, won’t last that long. You duty is to yourself and your family. Make the best of the time that you have, find fulfillment, success and peace of mind.
Everything else is just dust in the wind.
Adrian
/ Tuesday, 12 August 2008I ‘celebrated’ National Day by having chicken curry at a friend’s place and watching NDP via live webcast on the computer. The people I’ve got to know here think I’m mad. Kenneth, maybe you need to change jobs, or maybe it’s one of that phase in life things?
Lam Chun See
/ Tuesday, 12 August 2008For the past few years I have not watched the NDP on tv – at least not entirely. Somehow it seems different nowadays. Maybe too much song and dance; maybe too Westernized – reminds me always of the American football ‘show’. Maybe too much distraction in form of internet; esp blogging :)
Ordinary Guy
/ Wednesday, 13 August 2008I do feel a sense of change in the mood for National Day this year and even recent years back. Perhaps, National Day was no longer the same we experienced it during our much younger years. Things were much simpler then. I remembered the decentralised National Day Parade where marching contingents and mobile columns were just a few feet from we were squatting by the roadside, gawking at everything that passed in front of us. As we cope with the winds of change, we somehow lose a bit of our history which the younger generation may not cherished as much as we do.
Patricea Chow-Capodieci
/ Thursday, 14 August 2008The national day parade has slowly been evolving (should I even be using this word?) since the 30th year of independence or early. I think the last parade where I watched from beginning to end was when I was still in secondary school, so more than 15 years ago.
But you are right – it isn’t just the parade that has changed, it is also the ‘mood’ of the nation.
I am surprised that you have always felt that Spore is home, while I have always had the nagging suspicion that I didn’t belong, even though I was born and raised there. I thought that maybe I had a case of thinking that “the grass is definitely greener on the other side”, that I would change my mind after I leave the country to live and work in another place, and miss Spore so much that each time I return I would be more inclined to not leave.
Unfortunately, moving away has not changed what I felt since I was a girl of 13 or 14 – that I just do not belong among the population living their life there, for some strange reason. I cannot say that Bali is definitely home, but I feel more at ease here than I was in Spore, and that is a huge bonus.
Lam Chun See
/ Thursday, 14 August 2008On a diff. matter. I notice that WordPress seems to take much longer to access compared to blogger. But not yours. But yours is WordPress right?
acroamatic
/ Friday, 15 August 2008@ Everyone Thank you for your comments. I wasn’t expecting such a response.
@ Ee Ah, you are relishing it precisely because you know you won’t be around for a while. Don’t go lah. (I know… not possible.)
@ RockyRacoon Perhaps. But we’ve been through bad economic outlooks and situations before. For me, this is definitely not the reason. The Olympics stealing the highlight? Nah, I barely paid attention to the Olympics ’til after the opening ceremony! Only interested in the sports.
@ Victor Hahaha… how very Singaporean. ;-)
@ Teutoburg Indeed, life is short.
@ Adrian Heh. You’re very strangely a patriot lah. Nah, I’ve been very busy at work, but don’t need a change. Phase of life thing? Hmmm… maybe, but I don’t think so.
@ Chun See Hahaha… surfing the internet during NDP? Actually, I don’t think the problem with the parade is the song-and-dance and being too Westernised. For me, it is too… contrived. That, and the presence of the PAP contingent on the field. Allow all the parties a contingent or none at all.
@ Ordinary Guy I agree with your sentiments.
@ Patricea =) You’ve definitely always been at odds with Singapore in general. That PAP propaganda/programming… sorry, I mean National Education, can go wrong is heartening. (*gasp* Did I just write that?)
@ Chun See Yes, WordPress.com has been slow lately for some reason. I am not affected as I am running WordPress software on my own webspace.
Lam Chun See
/ Friday, 15 August 2008About the PAP contingent, did you know that as far back as 1971, when I participated as part of the Spore U contingent we already saw them. One of my friends shouted at them as their bus went by; “Hey .. how much do they pay you?”. I felt that was too much. But during my time, there were quite a lot of leftist students in SU.
Teutoburg
/ Saturday, 16 August 2008I overheard this conversation between two people on the bus yesterday. One was talking about how Panda Land was ‘dishonest’ with certain aspects of the Olympic opening ceremony while Lion City’s independence day performance was mediocre-ly rote.
And today, the national newspaper tells me some citizens are concerned of having Lion City in the shadow of Panda Land. Especially when ‘dishonesty’ and ‘mediocrity’ are involved, that is not promising at all.
pris
/ Thursday, 21 August 2008ive always felt like an expatriate with a red passport… but if people i meet on my travels start slagging singapore, i start getting really pissed off. maybe it is the programming as you say, mazbe its something else. who knows…
omg i typed this ok on a darn czech keyboard